Limits to Logic & Unconditional Love

"The entire career of a Bodhisattva is governed by two major characteristics: Wisdom and Compassion.

Buddhahood is accomplished by Wisdom, but the act of becoming a Buddha is accomplished by Compassion.

A Bodhisattva's own liberation is achieved through Wisdom, but his goal of liberating others is achieved through Compassion.

With Wisdom he recognizes others' suffering and with Compassion eliminates it.

Due to his Wisdom he becomes disentangled from Samsara, but due to his Compassion he remains in it.

Owing to his Wisdom, the Bodhisattva remains unattached to the world, but with his Compassion he embraces the world.

Because of Wisdom he does not become conceited, because of Compassion he does not become discouraged.

Wisdom brings self-advancement, and Compassion brings others' advancement.

More than all else, Wisdom brings him Lordship of the Dharma, and Compassion brings him Lordship of the World.”

The Venerable 3rd Bardor Tulku Rinpoche
Tibetan Spiritual Leader
(1949 -

We exist in a world of self-created extremes:

One Pole: Logic/Reason.
One Pole: Emotion/Love.

Indulging our predilection for logic, we examine, judge, weigh and evaluate everything – subjecting every aspect of our lives to withering analysis; probing all the cavities, pondering the yawning disparities between good, better and best, finding all the flaws and usually concluding that everything somehow comes up short. Under the daily pressure of life our refined sense of judgment turns to mere criticality. Thus the unsettling feeling of standing naked before the Father, being found unsatisfactory.

But then comes redemption, in the form of unconditional maternal acceptance. "It's all right Dear, your father has a high (maybe ridiculous) standard in his pointy head. But in the end, he'll listen to his heart...You bring Richard home to dinner, and everything will be all right... What we always want for you is happiness." So, Mother, once again acquaints us with the saving graces of our all too human nature: acceptance, love, happiness, warmth, affection. Enough with logic already. Yet, without father hovering in the background, Mom might have attempted to feed all the poor folks in town and adopt all the children. Sometimes compassion requires a buffer.

At 3:05 am, "BEST" is not attainable, but proximity to a warm, affectionate, perhaps sleepy person who loves you is as GOOD as it gets. Sometimes we strive, sometimes we settle. We're forced to draw a line at the end of each day, and accept the distance we've covered. Life is not lived entirely on the edge, but mostly on the journey through the vast middle.

Interestingly, it is our capacity to discern the distinctions between good, better and best which is the seed of our greatness, and great undertakings. Yet it is that same capacity, when taken to compulsive extremes which turns us into unforgiving critics – devoid of warmth and sadly lacking in compassion.

It is our devotion to what is right and good that prompts us to set lofty standards, and devote lifetimes to meeting them. We create institutions devoted to raising levels of education, public health and universal understanding, then watch as these very institutions become the instruments of extortion, obstruction and exclusion. As we devote ourselves to perfection, we sometimes find ourselves being perfectly critical and empty of love.

The perennial lesson: We are born not of one parent; but of two. Not of logic only, but of love as well. Not creatures of "either" are we; but of "AND."

The highest standard of expectation: judge your subject not solely against the cold steel of logic, but also against a loving heart.

Applications:

Personally: When you're ready to hang it up and slide over the bridge railing, pause and ask yourself: "Am I being too hard on myself? Given a little more time – could I move things in a positive direction?" Why not give yourself another day or two to achieve complete enlightenment?

At Home: Should we pack the kids and the spouse into a crate and airfreight them to Nepal? Or should we consider a family vacation to Nepal instead? The temples there are a once in a lifetime experience... Maybe you'll meet a Buddha in Katmandu.

At Work: The train felt like Hell this morning and the demons followed you up the elevator. Purgatory. Then you get a smile as a colleague rises over one partition and a few steps later you notice a colleague in a moment of career desperation – this is your chance to be the Buddha of compassion.

Now it all makes sense. Though we live in a world of extremes, our saving grace is our ability to keep them in proximity to one another.

Logic got us here AND Love makes it worth staying.