In praise of "Counselor Servant Sellers"

"One of the little joys of being a human being, is the occasional opportunity to enjoy "being human" together – to bask in the warmth of an affectionate smile, to appreciate an inside joke, to be caressed, to be served coffee by someone you know cares whether it's gone cold..."

–  J.R. St. John
   Executive Counselor,
  Consultant, Speaker
  Founder of The Fusion Group
  1952 –

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

All right, listen up! This is for all you sellers and servers suffering in silence thinking that you don't contribute anything to the nation, the economy, the company or your client / customers.

What if YOU are the uniqueness in the product? Yes, You!
What if you are the reason we buy the coffee?
What if you are the reason we feel safe investing in your anonymous money management company?
What if you are the reason we feel confident buying the new car from a different company with the custom glass and the very cool upholstery?
What if you are the reason we think buying the new computer is not a stupid risk?
What if you are the reason we were able to buy orthotics to resolve that nagging foot pain; confident that it wasn't diabetes, but flat feet?
What if it's your passion [about your product] that makes us want to hang around you and listen, as we buy your stuff to pay for the time?
What if it’s not the special paint?

Not the unusually cogent portfolio management team?
Not the super fast microprocessor?
Not the special sauce?
Not the price?
Not the time allocation required to attend the training...

What if it really is YOU, the person – the counselor servant seller; the individual responsible for hearing what the customer says, divining what they actually mean, then choosing the product, the access, the amount and the level of follow up required to keep them happy long term?

YOU. Not IT! You.

So now you’re probably busy erecting a wall of humility and misdirection... "Aw shucks ma'am, I didn't do nothin’."

But you did…you did something by "putting in the nothing" (the moment of profound personal understanding) right between when they finished and when you proposed a solution. There was a moment where you were listening and heard what they meant, and felt, and thought. In that moment, they were understood. (Being understood is not a quantifiable event – it's no-thing. And a pretty important nothing at that.) That moment made the next moment possible and meaningful... Because you were able to bring them exactly what they needed. You proved you knew them by serving up the answer to their question, the solution to the problem.

The solution could be had almost anywhere... or at least in several places. But YOU are what made it possible for them to find the answer today. Here. Now. Just in time. Before it was too late...

You. The product. The delivery mechanisms. Together, you form a powerful composite product solution. Without you, it's just another microprocessor on a shelf.

Some suggestions:

Managers: It generally takes longer to sell through service – so consider your management metrics carefully before coming down on your wildly effective servant sellers for not doing more meetings in less time. Manage to results, not merely the meetings. It's a different tack, but quality takes time… and builds long lasting relationships.

Sellers: Recognize that you can't get someone to listen – or absorb – until they have been heard out, and understood. So invest the time, and get what's on their mind and in their heart. You'll know if you've got a product that'll serve; and because you've listened – you'll have earned their trust in your advice.

Customers: (Especially you retail customers) those service people have a hard life, and they deserve your thanks and respect. Why not lavish a little extra TLC on your clerk next time and start them down the path of service?

Almost everything we own was purchased. Some of those purchase experiences were banal if not actually painful. Conversely, many were not only pleasant, but also rewarding far in excess of the price. We know you didn't have to do it. We know the extra study, patience and warmth is hard to summon up from the depths. Thanks…for your service! And for the opportunity to enjoy the pleasure of "being human together."

“When it is dark enough, you can see the stars.”

– Ralph Waldo Emerson
  Writer, Philosopher
  (1803 –1882)
 

It’s been a dark time: financially, politically, emotionally. It's been easy to see the comets, burning brightly for a second then flaming out.

Look again – People going to work. Serving silently. Still committed to duty, honor, community. Stars, helping you find your way.

In such times a few trustworthy partners, clients, providers and teammates stand out. By their longer hours, quiet commitment, and stable leadership; you’ll recognize them.

The stars aren’t lobbying for a bonus. But they might appreciate an “understated gesture of respect.”

Now is the time to narrow your team to those that shine – and move on together.

All world cultures recognize that we have a responsibility to do more than look out for ourselves.

The ability to genuinely engage and perhaps influence another human being is truly a gift – which carries grave responsibility – that of service. Reaching for a lofty or even noble purpose demands that we aim high: serving ourselves and our families, our business and local communities and even – a significant victory – the community of humankind.

The news is littered with incidences of powerful people skillfully arguing that they did nothing wrong while betraying their clients, their community and their culture. They are skilled, shameful – and shameless. It’s time to raise the bar and our expectations.

Fusion helps you acquire the skills to give voice to your ambitions.

The secret resides in the “Next Step.” Is it good for all concerned? Will it help the client/customer? Will it serve your firm, your family? Will it serve you? Then go tell this story!

Use your voice and your skills for the good of all!

“The Sleep of Reason Produces Monsters”

– Caprichos
   Francisco Jose de Goya y Lucientes
   Spanish Painter
   Portrait Artist to King Carlos IV
   (1746-1828)
 
 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
The Inquisition – 1799. Anonymous tribunals were determining guilt and issuing death sentences against people harboring unacceptable beliefs. Reason slept. Goya, the King's painter, issued a series of editorial cartoons which highlighted many of the absurdities... http://www.franciscodegoya.net/biography.html

2010 – Everywhere, “Reason” sleeps. Not reason with a small r, but “Reason” as in the rational contemplation of “the greatest good for all concerned.” 

“Reason” sleeps. Leaving us in the middle of this long nightmare of too much and too little. Too much spending and too little personal responsibility. Too much bellicosity and polarization and too little conversation. Too much credit and too little pay in advance. Too little investment and too much borrowing. Too much electronic buzz and too little personal connection. Too much reliance on government and too much blame, shame and guilt. Too little lifelong commitment to the family, the community and one’s own personal growth. Too much interference in other countries while our own cities and highways crumble. Too much emphasis on things and too little on character.

Everyone has a reason, their own personal excuse factory of explanations, justifications and stories about how it's all someone else's fault. It doesn’t matter who’s at fault. What matters is that nobody checks, nobody questions, nobody acts to protect the commons.

Too many “reasons” – and too little “Reason!” We need more people with “Reason,” who can remind us of what's important and help us decide how to proceed.

Wait a second; “Reason” isn’t some far away skill, owned by ancient philosophers. “Reason” slumbers in us all when we blame, borrow, or look the other way. “Reason” sleeps when we excuse City Hall because “We’re too small to make a difference...” Reason awakens when we actively look and say “What, Why, How and What Next?”

Wake up! This isn’t a philosophy lecture! It’s your life! Clear your mind and decide how you can make things better! Don’t fall back asleep. Get on with it! You've rested too long.

In your career, don’t get lost in the rush to judge, explain or excuse what’s happened. Instead, focus on the long-term goal of an improved game for all. Then get people moving in that direction. Be the one who nudges people onward every day.

In your personal life, it’s easy to go with the flow until you doze off and lose sight of where you’re going and what you stand for. Pause every so often, take stock and decide once again, “What’s this supposed to be about?” and “How do I get myself and my family where we’re going?”

If you look around and nothing makes any sense, you’re probably correct. (The truth is, most people are asleep, most of the time...) Now that you’ve awakened, you can perhaps awaken some others – and travel forward together.

We need you! It’s in your hands. Take care. Travel safe!

Poised for Outrage!

“Don't understand me so quickly!”

– Yul Brynner as Chris in "The Magnificent Seven"
 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Have you noticed that people are “Poised for outrage”? Cutting you off halfway through a sentence? That they see you as “evil incarnate” before they've heard your entire premise? Especially when there's an emotional charge in the air? There are lots of reasons: high-pressure circumstances, high speed technology and, of course, microwave popcorn. Everything moves faster these days – faster than we can process. Because of this, we should take more time to fully consider our response. Shouldn’t it take longer to decide than it takes to read the message? While we can connect quickly today, it still takes time to fully understand the intention of the sender. Comprehension requires actual consideration. I wonder if many of us are looking for confirmation of what we already believe, rather than a reasoned discussion of an issue.

There may be something deeper and perhaps darker here as well – the “magnetic desire for opposition.” Remember the elementary school magnets and the “field effect” where the two opposite poles would line up and snap together? Is there a similar effect in discourse? An individual makes a point, the field effect kicks in and people “click into opponency” while “understanding too quickly!” Nice, neat, immediate and probably incorrect. Too many “instant polar opposites” out there? So many “soul of evil” opponents... We're skeptical of any conclusion arrived at in seconds, or even minutes. Yet all over the public sphere, people begin speaking, others "understand them as enemies" – in nanoseconds. Apparently, the universe abounds with “field effects.” It’s emotionally satisfying to be “Right!” while simultaneously making others “Wrong;” but this magnetic desire tends to overpower reason or thoughtful response.

We fail to take time to reflect and consider fully not just what people are saying, but what they mean by it, and what their underlying intentions are. If we “understand the other side too quickly,” then allow the field effect to take over and place us into a neatly arranged opponency, we miss the chance to understand the depth of the other person’s reason and character. If we act too quickly, we might miss another person who has something to teach, a unique viewpoint or a gift of truthful perception.

Of course, we can find ourselves in the opposite situation – “clicking into instant support” before a complete thought has been expressed. Many times our friends and colleagues are likely to “gloss over” the nuances in our position.  While they are quick to express their commitment, they may not have grasped what they are being loyal to – and this unqualified overwhelming support does a grave disservice to a true position.

Conclusions: Poised for Outrage? Poised for Agreement? Instantly jumping to conclusions that support our pre-existing beliefs. It’s built into the human condition. Only time and consideration allow us to penetrate the depth of an argument. Black or white are easy to perceive – and often fall victim to the field effect. Shades of grey and nuanced logic require a certain depth of discernment that only comes with time.

What's the take-away?

As an individual: resolve not to interrupt. “Listen the other person out.” Allow the urge to react to pass before responding.

As a professional: recognize that a “perceived opponency or support” might be “artificial.” Take time to allow reason to work and suggest ways that both parties can win. We think that in corporate life, “slower is often better.”

As a family member: notice that in close emotional quarters, the field effect is always poised to position the other in an all too easy and all too satisfying position of “selected elected opponency.” Don't buy it. “Listen your sister, mate or partner out” and then allow reason – and a loftier purpose – to work.

Do everyone a service – hold out for the deep understanding. Few of us carry guns anymore, and this is no longer a western, but “Don't understand me so quickly!” is still great advice.

 
 
 
 
 
 

No Excuses

"I’m hopeful that the reforms that the secretary and the administration are undertaking will resolve the flaws in the current system that I inherited."
– S. Elizabeth Birnbaum
  Outgoing Director of the Minerals Management Service
 

 

What has happened to taking responsibility? Or assuming it? There’s certainly enough blame to go around…and lots of excuses and explaining. In fact, there’s an epidemic of blame! Excuses…Finding fault…Pointing fingers…A collective “throwing up of hands”…Anything but honestly taking responsibility. Instead, to avoid blame we seek to make others guilty.

Corporations, governments and individuals go to great lengths to avoid blame. Have you read a user’s
manual lately?

“Don’t use hair dryer while sleeping.”
“This TV remote is not dishwasher safe.”
“Caution – contents of coffee cup are hot.”
“500 piece jigsaw puzzle – some assembly required.”
“Do not use microwave oven for drying pets.”
“Wearing this Superman costume does not enable you
  to fly.”

Even the dry cleaner is culpable. He returns your clean, pressed shirts with broken buttons and points to the sign on the wall “Not responsible for broken buttons.” Of course, what we really need is a cleaner who will be responsible for a wearable clean shirt…

Blame is merely an excuse. It’s a way to lay guilt on others for one’s own failure to engage. When something goes wrong, the point is not to blame, excuse or explain it away. The objective is to take responsibility. “That’s my problem – I’m going to make it right!”

Excuses have no value; they don’t solve or improve anything. Excuses can be accepted, but they can’t be traded. Try paying for a burger in exchange for a second hand excuse…

Responsibility is "the ability to cause, admit causing and refrain from causing.” I bought the coffee. I know it’s hot. I’m taking my chances driving my car with a cup of hot coffee in my hand. If it spills, do I sue the coffee shop or take responsibility for the choice I made – no matter the outcome. People who are responsible are more interested in making things happen and improving things than they are in laying or ducking blame. They create products and services that can be exchanged with confidence. No blame. No excuses.

It’s not a blame-free world yet. So, anytime you’re in a situation where it’s tempting to blame others, ask yourself “What can I be responsible for?” “How can I make this situation better?” If more of us take responsibility – and keep our word – the world will be a more productive place. Step up to the plate!

How would your Executive Instruction Manual read?

Caution, contents under pressure!
Break glass only when responsible leadership is required.

Finding Cornersones

"Turn left where the old oak tree used to be!"
– Anonymous

Under Water

Minneapolis Star Tribune / Landov

TimePhotos.com

I asked directions on a country road in Louisiana. The old gentleman said, "Go down the road a piece, and turn left where the old oak tree used to be. Then go on 'bout five mile. You'll meet up with the freeway presently!"

He was so matter of fact about it, that I had gone a "piece" before I realized I had no earthly idea where the old oak tree used to be! His landmark was REAL to him long after the actual tree was history. The memory had substance and meaning for him that no outsider could understand.

We use landmarks (trees, clock towers, buildings, etc.) to assist us in navigating from place to place, then to firmly locate ourselves once we've arrived (Hey. I'm in New York, at the Waldorf, under
the clock!).

After a crisis, there's physical damage of course, but that's just the visible stuff. What's perhaps more insidious is the damage you can't see: the disorientation and the sense of hopelessness. As one of our neighbors said, "Katrina didn’t just f*** with our house, it also f***** with our heads!"

Noticing how debilitating it seemed when disaster overturned all the trees, clock towers and homes, it became slowly clear to me that the damage was not just physical, but intellectual and spiritual.

There was safety at risk, but also orientation (Where am I?), and certainty... (Who am I?). If the things we identify with are destroyed, our very identity can seem to be at risk as well.

It turns out, we “identify" with our physical, mental and spiritual landmarks, (We call them “Cornerstones”) and take some measure of our "personhood" from each – our work, our partners, our homes, towns, cars, industries and nation and when disaster strikes, many of our Cornerstones can be overturned, dislodged or destroyed – with powerful effect.

It’s the job of leaders, in the family, the town and the workplace, to put “Cornerstones In Place.” To explain the game to the players. To make it clear what we do here; what we stand for and how we play. Also, to re-install or recover Cornerstones after a crisis – when people desperately need to re-orient themselves – physically, mentally and spiritually.

What to do:

As an individual, the first challenge in life is to select your own Cornerstones which comprise your own unique point of view. What am I here for? How do I want to work, play and connect with others? Where do I choose to live? What is important to me? And how do I make this known to others?

As a family member, work to explain the Cornerstones to all the members; so they’re not just assumed, but really understood. (It’s the intangible Cornerstones that are sometimes the hardest to make clear.)

At work, seek to discover what the Cornerstones actually are! What do we do here? Why? For what kind of exchange? What style, attitude and methods make this place unique? What’s my “place?” How do I fit in?

As a manager, you are the Director of Orientation! "Here’s the game. Here’s how we do it. Here’s your role. Here’s what makes us special. Get to it!"

The hardest thing after a crisis is "getting back to it." Establishing, re-discovering, maintaining and putting people in touch with the firm's Cornerstones can help everyone find the oak tree!